Blissful Blog

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Sure, you can drink a glass of wine, get a great massage, have tea with a friend, and I wouldn't dismiss any of these options.

What I am talking about here is the type of de-stressing that only a sense of accomplishment offers. It's that relaxation you feel inside, at the cellular level, knowing you took something head on, got it done, and one more thing got crossed off the list.

Most of what we do to achieve this seems to come much later. Cleaning offers an instant gratification of sorts.

If you are looking for ways to streamline your life, manage your time & finances, de-stress,  find peace in your home and time to chill, this might just be the answer. Because no matter what you do, you still have to come home.

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Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be. -Wayne Dyer

 

An effective way of retraining our mind is cleaning. It is effective because it is so ordinary and simple. I can think of nothing else that pushes our ought-to-be-doing-something-else button more than cleaning. And letting go of this idea is a requisite to experiencing peace.
Cleaning can be a more effective practice in accepting "what is" than sitting meditation, because it challenges our ego to embrace something that most of us don’t like.

What cleaning really is is a practice in loving parts of ourselves and what we already have in our lives. We are usually so focused on what we don’t have and want, and on the missing pieces, that we can’t rest. Neglecting the stuff that are right in front of us can be an obstacle for further growth. Taking pause to care for these things means that we are paying attention, so that we can move forward more effectively. After all, knowing and appreciating what we have helps us to know how and where we need to go.
Cleaning is a simple practice in taking inventory of our blessings and moving on from there.

I hopped off my meditation cushion feeling centered, ready to have a wonderful day. As I passed the kitchen I noticed that it could use some cleaning. The thought “Ugh, this is going to ruin my meditation high,” had just started to form when I remembered my new awareness.

I paused and took a few breaths.

For five years now I have had a daily meditation practice and my relationships and career have become more loving and authentic as a result.
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Recently, I was spending a lot of time with an important person in my life, and at some point, it felt like it was a big challenge to get his full attention. I felt frustrated by it, a lot! He had started a new job and was really distracted with his new schedule and how to juggle every other aspect of his life.

At the same time, I had just left my full time job and had all the time in the world, although I really didn’t have all the time in the world. My intention with that time was to move forward with other freelance projects, including writing on this blog, but felt completely overwhelmed by all the open space in front of me. I am glad I was able to realize this because, after spending a week saying things to him like, ‘Hello! I’m right here! Why aren’t you paying attention to me?’, I realized these were questions I needed to ask myself instead.
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Running has taught me to appreciate my body and what we as humans are capable of doing with our bodies. When I run, I marvel at what is possible.

Yoga has taught me to listen to my body. It has strengthened my nervous system in a way that has made me so mentally strong that I know if I put my mind to doing something, I can do it. I know that what my body feels is temporary. I know I have hurt before, or I have been too hot, etc., and I have pushed through and just… done it. Continue Reading

I’ve been reading the upsetting story of the young 12 year-old boy in New York who died after a sudden infectious illness. He died of septic shock just a few days after he cut his arm while playing basketball at school. His family physician missed the diagnosis. The ER doctors also missed the diagnosis. Both thought he was dehydrated and needed fluid. Both missed the signs they should have seen. Continue Reading

I recently met up with a good friend for tea and breakfast. It was one of those small miracles where things aligned just right so that, despiteour busy lives, we somehow found time to meet. Both of us are working mothers and are always trying to find ways to bring more balance and mindfulness into our lives. As we caught each other up on how our summers were going, we started lamenting that as fun as the summer could be, it really didn’t bring us much more rest. In fact, in many ways we felt more tired, and our mindfulness practices were often put aside as we planned outings, chauffeured our kids around, and also led classes and did other work related things. Continue Reading

When hiking a path it is usually a place we know we are walking on, up to a point. We may research a place and drive to it, bring water and food, sunscreen, wear the right shoes, and then go. Even when we have the intention to walk it, we may not understand who walked on it before or care at the time, or know that we should care. It was like that for me last week when my friend took me on a trip to South Dakota and planned a hike up to Harney Peak. Continue Reading

We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking that we used when we created them.

I've heard this many times, and didn't know until recently that it was Albert Einstein who said it (first?).

I suppose this is why we have coaches, mentors, allies-- someone outside of ourselves --to help us out of the cyclical patterns in which we get stuck and into our next great potential.

There is another tool. I wrote about it here. This is not to say we shouldn't reach out to others; as they also say, it takes a community...  also, it's fun to work with others. This tool acts like a powerboost (like what they add to smoothies!) to anyone you work with. And on its own, it still works wonders. The potency is in its practice and the intention one puts into it.

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I wrote a blog on Spiritual Hungers just over a month ago, and since then, have been asked to give some examples of spiritual hungers and how to work through them. So here is one example.

In the beginning of June, and during the transitional period between the last week of school and summer vacation, like any mom, I mentally prepare to let go of my usual routine, make a check list of what needs to be prioritized, and then I go with the flow. Soon enough, the kids and I get into our summer routines, and life finds a new pattern.

That transitional time can be challenging. I know that I am not alone in this.

So when I show up to teach my Wednesday morning yoga class, and no one showed up, well, I was frustrated. I felt like maybe I'm not such a great teacher, so I felt sad and a bit like a failure. I thought maybe the studio was not valuing my class enough to do its part in marketing my class, so I felt angry with them. I looked at the clutter in the studio and decided that they are not organized. I felt irritable and wanted to judge their clutter as a reflection of what was going on. Maybe I am not putting enough love and energy into my classes to command priority in my students' lives. I felt regretful. Then I went back to being frustrated because I pulled away from a million things on my plate to be here. Then I was mad again because no one showed up.

Of course, what followed -all in the blink of an eye- was what seemed lacking in my relationship (why hasn't he called?), what I perceive to be abundant on my waistline (it was lunchtime. I should have a salad), the lack of email replies. Am I making this up? Or has everyone abandoned me? No one loves me.

I got in the car. And I stopped for a moment. I drank some water and connected with my breath. Then I asked myself, "Savitree, right now, what is your hunger?" I remained silent. To hear the answer. And it came. "I hunger to matter." "I hunger to be important enough to be a priority!"

Next question to Self: "So how will you make yourself a priority?"

Important to note: I didn't ask, how will you make others prioritize you? or how will you make yourself important to others?

Reality check: I know I matter. I also know that I can do more (or less!) to prioritize myself. I know that I can shift my own actions to reflect mattering more for myself.

Once I asked myself this question, and then answered it, I knew exactly what to do.

Here is a list of spiritual hungers, which was given to me by the Wright Leadership Institute of Chicago.  Hunger to...

• exist
• to be seen
• to be heard
• be touched
• be loved
• be affirmed
• be respected
• be known
• be understood
• matter
• know another person
• be close
• feel connected to others
• be intimate
• love
• express
• experience fully
• learn
• trust
• create
• make a difference
• be valued, and to value
• fulfill my purpose
• feel connected to the greater whole
• know God

Yoga teaches us to serve others. But we can give only what we have. Our capacity to serve others is limited to our capacity to serve ourselves before we feel depleted. It is up to us to make ourselves whole. No one can do that for us. It wouldn't even be fair to ask.

So what happened once I had my answer and I realized what I had to do? I took action. My actions did require reaching out to others for sure, as they typically do. We are interdependent beings. I just didn't transfer the responsibility onto another to make me whole. My hunger was met.

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